Authenticity-the quality of being authentic.
At the end of last year, I was down with influenza and a cough that apparently, really liked me and wanted to take us residence. I was exhausted to the point of wanting to just sleep all day, and honestly, do not remember ever feeling like this.
Many of you don't know, but I have four autoimmune disorders. They raise their ugly head often, and I have learned ways to cope. If I get sick, though, the conditions are exacerbated and it takes a lot longer for my system to get back to my "normal". So, what could have been a week or two of illness has turned into a month.
Most people who have autoimmune disorders look fine. They don't look physically "sick". For me, though, there are things on the outside that are a direct result of the autoimmune issues I have. But, up until now, they have not stopped me from actually functioning like I usually do. This time around, though, they have. So,when I was down, I was a little absent from social media, my community and working on my business. On the positive side- I had the opportunity to disconnect from my daily routine and reflect on everything; and it has been a very good thing.
Having this down time has given me time to reflect, re visit, and re think many things with my life and my business. How many of you do that on a regular basis? How many of us can actually disconnect on a regular basis from our busy lives? It is rather sad that I had to get sick in order to do that.
Are you wondering yet why this post is called "Authenticity?".
That is the word and characteristic that became very important to me this past month. Being authentic as a person and business owner-being true to who I am and having that carry over into my business became key.
Many of us look at others and pre judge, or make a judgment about people based on our first impression with them. That is normal. But, that might not be the truth.
We, as people, have many layers, and often do not show our true selves at first glance. We are human, we make mistakes, and we fail. We also succeed, and do good in our service to the world and others.
How we treat each other can be determined by our first impression, or our first "judgement" or "perception" about a person, too.
Recently, I visited a local store to acquire some gift cards for a raffle I was sponsoring. The cards were at the top of a very tall end cap, and I could not reach them. So, what to do?
Walking over to the customer service desk, I waited my turn and politely asked, " Do you have a stool I can borrow to reach an item at the top of the end cap?"
The customer service employee looked at me, and just said, "I will see if I can find one." I said, "ok!"
I then proceeded to watch, as she and two other employees began talking. The one I spoke with walked into a back room, and in my mind, I thought,"Oh, maybe the stool is in there!".
I was wrong.
She came out with a clipboard and proceeded to continue talking with the other two employees all the while I waited in the line. I began to wonder if they were actually going to look for the stool.
So, I asked another employee behind the counter, "Do you have a stool I could borrow?" Her reply, " We are working on it." And, she turned her back on me and went to the back room.
How long would you have waited?
I waited a few minutes, and upon realizing this was going nowhere, I went back to the area where the gift cards were. There in the aisle, was a tall man. Hurrah! Somebody who could reach for me! (in case you did not know-I am only five feet tall)
And, just so you know-this end cap was directly in front of the customer service desk, so they could see what I was doing.
I asked the kind man if he would reach the cards for me, and sure enough, he did. Simple as that.
As I was walking past the customer service desk, this was the reply I heard-
"Oh, I am so sorry! I thought you were a VENDOR! We would have helped you more if we knew you were a customer."
What?
So, in my mind-you prejudged me and thought I was a vendor. And, in doing so, you treated me differently than you would have if you knew I was a customer.
Hmmmmmmmm
Why not treat everyone the same? With the same respect and the same love?
This is more a case of pre judging, or a mis perception about someone. I do not know what was going on in the person's head, or why she thought I was a vendor at the store and needed a stool to stock something. I have no idea.
But, the take away from this was this-I was treated differently based on who she thought I was.
Which brings me to AUTHENTICITY.
Being true to you.
My month long sabbatical had me reflecting on what that really means, and that experience played a part as well.
What do you think of this?
Seven Traits of Authentic People
1. Have realistic perceptions of reality.
2. Are accepting of themselves and others.
3. Are thoughtful.
4. Have a non hostile sense of humor.
5. Are able to express their emotions clearly and freely.
6. Are open to learning from their mistakes.
7. Understand their motivations.
We like to spend time with people who are real and not "phony". We trust them and appreciate who they are. Authentic people usually know themselves. They are able to listen to their inner voice and often can understand their feelings.
To be authentic, we also need to be able to face up to the truth about ourselves, no matter how difficult we might find it.
I am not sure if we can ever truly understand ourselves. I think it is a work in progress, and as long as we are willing to learn, progress, and work through and own up to our mistakes, then we are on the right track.
So, how does this all fit with Songs of Life Photography?
First, I am the business. I am Songs of Life Photography Studio, so it will be how I am. If that even makes any sense.
For example, I am not a person who shops at luxury stores and needs the latest and the greatest stuff.
I am not a person who values "stuff".
I AM a person who values people, their relationships with each other, and having them see that.
I AM a person who values tangible pieces of people's history.
I AM a person who believes that photographing families and showcasing their lives is truly priceless and absolutely necessary.
And, I am a person who believes that every family is different, so there are no cookie cutter photographic sessions.
Being authentic is also being passionate about beliefs and actually following through with what you believe in. Anyone can be passionate about what they believe and show it, but the action is what sets a person apart.
"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And, most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become." Steve Jobs
So, in keeping with the spirit of being truly authentic, I am going to follow my heart and intuition even more with my business. I truly value the expertise of the many mentors I have had the honor of listening to-regarding business and regarding photography-and they have played an integral part in building Songs of Life Photography.
But, I have to start defining who I am and what Songs of Life Photography is going to truly become.
The core values-our full service experience, valuing you and your loved ones, and treating you like kings and queens will never change. Our mission to provide you with tangible heirlooms that you can love in your home now and pass down to future generations, and showcasing you and your family in an authentic way-who you are- will not change because these are our core values and what we are truly passionate about.
What will change is this-customizing each and every portrait experience even more to each individual to truly make it an authentic session that will best showcase you.
And, providing a portrait experience to EVERYONE who wants it. Even if your finances say otherwise.
Please call us to learn more about everything you have just read. I would love to talk with you and learn more about your family and who you are, and of course, provide a wonderful portrait experience that you will remember for years to come.
2 Comments
Feb 12, 2019, 9:47:52 PM
Linda Bell - Hi Mariah and Ron,
You two are two of the most beautiful people I have had the honor to meet. Your words truly touched my heart.
It is because of you and others like you that I can continue forward serving my community. Thank you so much for your beautiful words, and I certainly hope we can see each other again!
Feb 12, 2019, 5:40:15 PM
Mariah (Rettenmeier) Picarsic - Dear Linda, I loved reading this, and all I could think was how accurately this fits the experience Ron and I had with you as our wedding photographer over a year ago. You truly are the definition of an authentic individual, and you certainly strive to create individualized, authentic portrait experiences. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, for being who you are, and for sharing your gifts through your business in your open, honest, and generous way. You were so kind to us as our wedding photographer, and we have never forgotten it. Thank you again. Mariah and Ron Picarsic (10/14/17)